Moments....

From this moment to this moment to the current. I have always wanted to give my children the world. I want to grant them a life without pain or sorrow. I'm not in control of that, but I can love...and my ability to love has grown with both of them in my life. My 1st moments with my children where not what I expect and planned for.....their births where scary and NOT ever what I had dreamed, imagined and hoped for. With Callen they kept loosing his heartbeat and it resulted in a emergency c-section due to a prolapsed cord. It was a cold room I was put completely under-not getting to hear my sons 1st cries, not getting to see him not having my husband by my side.....With Paisley it was the pit of my stomach type fear.... I knew that morning something wasn't right...words cant even begin to describe the feelings that come with the unknown. Luckily I was able to have my rock beside me to pray with me and to let me know what was going on....I did not have to be put under and I was able to hear her 1st cries and see that she was small yet still a nice small size....I didn't get to look at her or kiss her or smell her first sweet breaths like I have envisioned but when I as able to finally see both my children for the 1st time I was able to take those moments in...

So you ask where is this post going.....let me share

Life is short--- immeasurably short...don't take moments for granted, enjoy the moment you are in, take it all in, don't relish in the things you cannot change, don't let the bitterness take control of your heart. Life is more grand then many of us realize and at a moments notice it can all be taken away or any part of it can change...

I look back and I cant remember rubbing my pregnant belly with Paisley one last time ( that aches my soul) or caving in and reading that one last bedtime story again to the little boy nagging me..... don't get caught up in the material things life has to offer because when it is all layed out on the table you would give it all away just to have your family safe or your newborn daughter be ok ( i have been there and Chris and I would have both given ANYTHING that morning to have Paisley be ok). Life is precious it is a gift and it is the one thing that should not be taken lightly. When they say children are life's greatest blessings there MOST DEFIANTELY ARE!!! I tell many my babies are my heart walking around on my sleeves and they are! I would give anything and everything for the two of them....any parent feels that way. Everyone is given path that are different we all face different obstacles but at night when we all lay down the one thing no matter what that we all have is FAMILY and at the end of the day that family is going to be there through thick and thin..good times and bad.. so today I would like to say

Thank you for being my family--- You are my light in dark tunnels, an ear when I need one, you have shared the good times and the bad, you have been there through rough roads and you have been there for all the milestones. With out each of you we wouldn't be where we are today and for that I am grateful!!! And while some of you may not be blood related and just friends you are still family!!

Sending love across the miles and hoping you are all blessed beyond belief for what you have done in my life, my husbands life and my children's lives.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart!